Super Bowl ! Feb 7th

Karyn and I woke up and got ready to go do a dirty passion ..... Estate sale . It was the last day so granted it is slimmer picking but you get a better price and can normally haggle with them . I am kinda kicking my self in the butt right now for going against myself on a few items . I gave myself a five dollar limit ( yes five bucks is a good price limit for me , it is the standard beginning limit ) . There was this really pretty deviled egg dish , it was orange glass that had a kinda oil finish to it but it was 6 dollars which would put me out of my range . I might have to start looking at 2nd hand stores for one . I thought that instead of eggs it might make a good earring holder and bracelet holder . I found Karyn up stairs in the house and was in awe of how many doilies the lady had own . The man that had lived there had tons of pocket watches and all the stuff to go with the watches . They had some really cool stuff . Sometimes estate sales kinda feel like a museum . It's like a day in the life of someone . I am blow away at how much you feel like you can get to know a person just by seeing their stuff . Makes me wonder what people will think of me when they look through all my stuff . I think I might have to aquire a couple bizzar pieces just to make them wonder ..... hahaha I still get the last laugh ! haha .... Karyn found a few cool things for her house and I got myself a nice little serving tray ( $1 ) ( just had to brag that I was 4 $ under buget )

Karyn and I load the car with our finds and head off to the store to get our fixens for bean dip . Karyb got the idea to make a 7 layer dip in either the shape of a football or the feild . She went with the feild . She even piped on the lines of the feild useing a frosting bag and wrote the team names in the end field . It looked pretty cool . I found that the way it was eaten might of been a early preminisssion to the way the game ended . The Colts end feild was eaten and only the Saints remained . I wonder if we could test this theroy somehow ? I wonder if it would work as well as the chicken that picks winning teams ?

Walking with Bethany . Feb 6th

I woke up to Karyn's cat looking at me , as if to say where is my food lady ? I want my morning treat ! Every morning when I have breakfast I feed Rainie and give her a little Friskie's treat . I think I have set the bar now for sister . I have made her cat that much more high maintenance . Bawhahaha !!! Shows Karyn ! Lets me into her house , takes care of me , gives me her bed while she sleeps on the couch , takes me to my appointments and feeds me ! I sure showed her ! Made her cat want one more thing . Hahahaha ! Little sister strikes again ! Little sisters of the world unite ! ( I think I git to much sleep last night )

Well Beth picks me up and she asked me where I wanted to go . I looked at her and declared I am out of the house it's a nice day , I am down for what ever ! So she heads the car to Starbucks and we grab a cup and a little snack . We banter for awhile over our lives and our familys . Have a few laughs then decieded to bask in the winter sun .

Beth said she has to change her shoes so she drives to her new house . It was so cute ! Totaly Beth . Her family had just rescued a border collie that weekend and he was a keeper ! He had high energy , barely barked and had a nice shinny coat . While Beth went on a scavenger hunt for her shoes I talked with her husband . Beth came down with tennie runnners on and had bunddled up a little bit more . We were off !

We decieded on Titlow . It is a pretty flat surface and it is paved . Which is good for me . Baby steps . 30th hill can wait a few more months . I have not been to Titlow in a long time . It is a really nice park . As Beth and I start to walk I see a little jack russel terrier who I know . It's Dave Justice's dog Jack . Beth thought I was being funny and saying hi to the dog and just blew it off as me being me . Till we got to Dave and I said hi to him also . After we were a few feet away she giggles a little and says oh you do know them . We walked around the park discussing important things like how rude kids are today , class room sizes , Tacoma schools vs. U.P. schools , tumors , and how can we make a differance in our world , commmunity , ect. It was a full walk . Left me with a ton of questions that I need to answer sooner than later .

It is nice to have a friend like that who you have known for so long , you can express your opinions and feeling and they don't label you a asshole or a idiot for feeling a certian way . I love that I have friends like that where we can debate a topic and not agree on something then a few minutes later be laughing over something different . They don't let it sit on their shoulders . I think that is a good trait to have . The ability to move on and forward .

Feb. 5th Getting ready

Well I went over to my place for the 1st time really since Jan. 4th !! Over a month ! Needless to say it smelled . The trash had needed to be taken out about 5 weeks ago . I was nervous to open the fridge . I thought I might need a Full body suit with oxygen mask . It was pretty full of food that I had just bought on Jan. 3rd sooo annoyed to throw away all that food . Oh well . Karyn was a trooper and helped me empty out the fridge before her meeting that day . I wanted to get all the big stuff that I could in the trash before they came for pick up . Made it on time and was even able to add a few more bags . I am amazed that my trash guys come pretty much at the same time every week . at about 10- 11 am . I have lived places where they come one week at 7am and the next at 3pm . I like knowing helps with the cleaning schedule .

After Karyn left me at my place I looked around baffled at where I would start . I have to be honest , I had been really tired the last few months . Working a short shift about 6 hours I would feel pretty tired . So I really hadn't cleaned cleaned my place in awhile . I mean I surfaced cleaned but no dusting , moving the couch , wiping down the shelfs , or window washing . It seemed that doing those things dipped to much into my nap time the last 3 months . So I decided to honor what I had promised Karyn and not over do it . I turned on the T.V. to Discovery and conjure a attack plan . I conclude to work only during the commercials . I figured I can not over do it in that amount of time . Plus then after the commercial is over I get a 15 minute break ! Sweet ! Things that take a commercial break to do , it is so easy and such a small amount of time , a sink load of dishes , load the washer then fold whats in the dryer and reload dryer , scrub sink bathtub and toilet , sweep kitchen and bathroom floor . I was pretty happy with my system . I am intrested to see what else I can find that takes just 5 to 7 minutes .

I had mom pick me up at 2ish and her and I went and had a late lunch at E-9 . It was my 1st time back there since I have been out . It was great to see everyone ! Mom and I went to the bar and had a seat at the buddy bar . Mandy was bartending I was super impressed that she remembered how specific my mom is about her soda . Mandy even remembered the light ice part . Mom and I sat in there for awhile chatting and giggling . It was nice . Sometimes I find myself in these moments where I dont really feel like I had a tumor or that anything was ever wrong with me . I think it is due to the fact that I found out I had a tumor then with in 24 hours I didn't . It just never really had time to sink in . I think I am the better for it , sometimes for me sitting or stewing on something that huge can eat at me . I am glad it happened the way it did ( as morbid as that might sound .... ) .

Mom and I after lunch went to Target . She need a new laundry hammper . I just wanted to stay out of the house longer =) . After mom found the right hammper for her I made her look at all the discount racks . I found a few things to try on . So did mom . We had a small fashion show complete with turns and hip checks . I found a nice sweater that I can wear to a few dinner that I have coming up . I love the 50 and 75 % off racks . It is hard to find a good reason why I should't buy something that is five dollars and looks that good on me .

I have mom drop me off back at my house so that I can finish a load of laundry and the last sink of dishes . I take a look around and feel like I was wonder women for getting done what I got done . I figure if I keep it up my place should be ready no time . It will feel good to be in a nice organized cleaned and smelling good and cozy home . Kinda like a hug from a great friend . Welcoming , comforting and releaving ( or is it a release that you get ? from the pressures of life or the problem ? or is it a transfer ? like you place your problem on their shoulder for the duration of the hug ? Makes tha mind reel ! ) .

Thursday, February 4, 2010

I picked up Elizabeth after her body molding around noon. She still had faint traces of netting that enveloped her face. I'm sure she will blog about it. We went to Wendy's Vietnamese at FreightHouse Square for some yummy veggies, rice with curry and tofu. We split the huge serving and had spring rolls that we could only eat one of, so that's a snack for Karyn and Liz later. We had a bit of a discussion about the spiciness... she likes 5 (highest) and I like about 1.5 (something, but not all heat), we settled on a 3. It was very good, as usual. If you've never tried "Wendy's" you're in for a treat. There is also one on Tacoma Mall Blvd (Wendy's II). When Elizabeth and Karyn were in elementary school and had friends around and we talked about going to Wendy's the other kids thought "hamburgers", but were brought back down to earth when we told them is was stir fried Asian cuisine. E & K have always liked veggies and have always eaten a lot of them. So now that Eli needs to eat 5-6 fruit/vegetables she is happy. I sure enjoy being around Elizabeth, she is a positive person who keeps everyone around her on target... the keep your eye on the prize target we are aiming for. Thank you for reading her story. Keep up the prayers, good vibes, emails, phone calls and comments in the blog. All of it makes her happy. It's one thing to have friends, but to see them taking an interest is really uplifting. Thanks.

Feb. 3rd

Yesterday was a good day . I got a few thank yous done and mailed ( yippy ! small victory ) I went for a nice little walk , man I still can't get over how stuff like that makes me tired . I tried to be in denial that I was tired then I heard my aunts voice telling me I need to rest ! If I don't I'm only hurting and hindering my own recovery . So I took a cat nap with the cat . Karyn's cat is my kiss of death , she puts me to sleep in a few minutes flat with her warmth and purring . Love her !

I woke up to Karyn saying we had to go go go to make my doctors appointment . We made it there just in time . I really don't like to be late either does Karyn . So the car ride there was a little bit tense . I was relieved though to find out I did not need blood work done . Yes ! I avoided the needle again !!! ( another small victory )

The nurse takes us back into a room where instead of a table is a old school dental type chair . Weird to see in a radialogist office dont you think ? Well I look past my thoughts of weirdness and have a seat . The nutristionist is the first appointment . She was there to let me know what I should be eatingand stuff I should stay away from . Stuff to stay away from - Concentrated pills like green tea ( hinders what the radiation is doing ) , Fried foods ( duh ) , and foods high in fat or made with cream . Stuff that is good - Six to seven servings of fruit and vegetables , 100 ounces of water ( talk about a bladder buster ! ) , and light excercise ( keeps the body strong ! Grrr !!! )

After that the nurse takes a to a different room to meet with my radialogist . He comes in and says his hellos then procedes into the news . He tells us that he has some what good news and some what bad news . He says that they found "suspicous" cells . I kinda giggel and he looks at me a bit perplexed and I ask him if that means they are dressed in black and creaping around in my spinal fluid ? He smiles says he has never heard it put quit that way but yes sort . The cells that they found were found to be unidentifiable ( Why can't they find out the names of any thing in my body ? Maybe I'm not from here ... " take me to your leader " said in bad 50's alien voice ) also my protien count was high . He told us that if the lab techs hadn't known my case they would of told him to xray my whole body to find the cancer . Why ? High protein count in the spinal fluid can be a sign of cancer .

So he proceeds to tell me the plan of action . They will radiate my head and my spine . BLAH ! That sounds like a lot to me . He went in to the whole processes of body forming so that I don't move and laser markers ( small tattoos so they know where to treat . ) . He then started talking about the depression that people go through when they hit this part of treatment . I have to admit I haven't tried to think this far a head yet . The most thought I gave it was that I got a wig . I never thought about how I would feel while losing my hair or while it was growning back . How it would feel to get the radiation fatigue that I hear about or the nasua that can happen . So he tells us that just doing one small thing that makes you happy can help you from falling pray to the deaper side of the depression . He said that everyone gets depressed who goes through this if you did not he would worry .

I left the office feeling somewhat in my own little world . I know that I have a mini army of people who care and love me to help me get through this but for the first time I kind of felt lonley . I can't think of another word to discribe it , lonely is not the word i want but it is the closest one . This has been a strange trip so far and I am barely at the half way point . I am somewhat nervous to see what happens but a good amount of me is excited for some unknown reason .

Feb. 2nd Dentist

Well it was kind of a slow day today . Nice relaxing morning . Read a little of my book " Breakfast with Buddha " . It is such a great book . I have been trying to read it slow so that I can enjoy it longer . Not quit working . Oh well it is still a good read . =)

I still have some swelling in my head so sister made an appointment for me to go see my Neurologist . He looked at my head and said that the swelling was normal . It was new tissue and it takes awhile for fluid to pass through it . He told me to only worry if it gets squishy . Yuck ! Then we asked him about me passing out during the spinal tap . He said it could be a few things but not to worry it had nothing to do with my surgery or the area of the brain that I had work on . It just goes to prove I'm a big old baby . That is ok by me , I accept my baby-ness .

Then one of my favorite parts of the day ! I heard from someone that if you get radiation done and you have a bad tooth or something wrong with your teeth it can spread to your whole body . That got me kinda freaked out . I just had my annual check up in October but I don't want to take any chances . So my dad makes and appointment for me . I go in and they look at my teeth and poke around a bit and declare my mouth good . Wooohoooo ! Now the real good part the teeth cleaning . I love having my teeth cleaned it is up in my top 30 of things I love . A awesome most amazing day for me would be teeth cleaned , pedicure , hair washed , some time in the sauna , and all with a few friends to share in the happiness .

Paul came over at about five . Karyn put him to work for a little bit . He gets to do the manly stuff , stuff that he says takes muscles . Karyn and mom made home made fish and chips ( actually tatertots ) It was good . They even made some with salmon . I made a salad . We all sat down and ate . My poor dad got made fun of a little bit , then he started shooting it back on to everyone . Not so poor dad . We all sat around the table for a bit chatting and laughing at each other .

Karyn offered up dessert . Left over cake from the Ale House Benefit or the tasty pie Ramona and Mike gave me . They said both . Then came the five year old voices " Do you have ice cream to go with the pie and cake ? " . Duh ! How can you have pie with out ice cream !?! Please ! Karyn thought of that as soon as she saw my pie so did I .

After dinner mom and sister played guitar hero so paul and I went and watched T.V. in my room . Paul and I found a channel to watched and snuggled down . After about a half hour I was asleep . What can I say , I am on blue hair time .

Spinal Tap Feb. !st

Well I woke up this morning with a slight sore throat and a small head ache . I smiled and thought to my self can you have a social hang over ? That is what I felt like my head was still kinda swarming with conversation from the night before . I thought of a few different high points and found my self laughing out loud a little . Then thanked the heavens that no one made me give a speech oye ! I would of done the ugly cry and that is never something you want to do in public . Thank you all for not making me give a speech .

Sister came in my room and told me the plan for the day ..... a spinal tap ... blah ! So I procrastinate getting out of bed till about 30 till we have to leave . I start getting dressed and then I stop and think to my self I can't wear this it has metal in it . So I find my jammie bottoms take off my bra - every time I wear one to the hospital I have to take it off so whats the point right ? - put on a tank yop and a t-shirt and call it good . No sense in dressing up for the day spent in the inner walls of the hospital .

Sister and I wait for almost an hour to get in for my appointment . They had a few others who were in worst shape then me who get in 1st . Which is fine by me , I'm sure I trumped a few people when I went for test when I first got there . So we sat there and watched Cops and it was a good episode . Favorite part is when the cop steped in dog poop while in a house . I'm easily entertianed what can I say .

I get called back into the room and it is the biggest machine I had seen so far . The nurse asks me a few questions then tells us about what is going to happen . I tense up . Sister comes and puts her hand on my shoulder . The nurse tells me if it feels uncomfortable don't jump try and remain calm and just tell us it hurts . In my head I was thinking - ARE YOU F"ING KIDDING ME !!!!! - Well the nurse hands me a robe and tells me to change and informs me to leave my undies on but take every thing else off . I go to change and start laughing . It was the second time I was not wearing underware . Hahaha so I ask her if I can wear my jammie bottom and all she could do was laugh at me and say sure .

I lay on my tummie and she puts a pillow under my tummie for a flater back area where the injection site will be ( with drawl site either or ) . The nurse starts to prep for her part and she had this awesome lead suit that was something out of the wizard of oz . It was a emerald green foa snake skin lead suit that was a skirt and vest . I was hopping she would bust out in the a song from the movie .... one can wish .

The needle lady comes in and the machine comes to life and the table I am laying on starts to go up and down and the x-ray " eye " is spining around and she is giving the nurse directions that do not make sense to me . Then I hear a small victory in the needle lady's voice " theres our spot ! " She lanicains the area and tells me I will feel a slight pinch . I think to my self relax . I am finding this to almost be my mantra . The pinch was not that bad . So I mentally tell myself that She is a pro this won't hurt , let your fears go , and that nothing so far has hurt as bad as I thought it would . So I let go of the fear .

Needle lady says that she is in the area and is about to take out my spinal fluid . She starts to with drawl and my body starts to feel weird not the good weird either . I say to her that I feel funny she tells me to discribe the weirdness . It kinda feels like when you drink a glass of cold water and you can feel it go all the way down to your tummy , but through my whole body and like 60 percent more intense . While I am talking I guessed I passed out . I woke up to them yelling my name . I kinda flinch up and the Needle lady tells me not to move because I still have the needle in my spine . I am shaking and have the cold sweats . The nurse is talking to me calming me down . I ask her if this is a normall thing . She daps my forhead with a damp cloth and say soory but no , I think this happened because you had low fluids . ( WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN !!! ) She then asked me how much water did you drink before you got here ? I tell her a glass of water . She tells me I should of drank a lot water . OH well no one told me that I would of if I would of known .

Another nurse comes in a declares me good they finish the spinal tap and take me away to be obbserved for about an hour . I thought I had been everywhere in the hospital . Boy was I wrong . They took me to a place that reminded me of what hospitals must of been like before t.v.'s and private rooms . All the little area had was a curtain and a few devices . It was super quite too , which is weird in a hospital .

I have some apple juice , water , and then some grape juice . The nurse takes my vitals and says I am good to go . Yippy !!! I get put in a wheelchair and get rolled back to where I started . Sister looks at me and asked if I'mm ready to go home . She has no idea how ready I am to go .

We get home I lay down as flat as I can and my body tells me it is ready to nap . I give in . Sleep feels good .